This made me so shocked and sad that I didn't even know what to do

[foolish_m0rtal]

One of my friends has a tendency to lash out at people when she's feeling frustrated or upset. I really don't like this, but I'm not sure exactly what I can do about it, because she's a wonderful person otherwise.

She was working on physics homework, and we were showing her the trick of manipulating equations to solve the physics problem.

I remember she said, "I can't do that. I just can't see that." And then after getting frustrated, "Sam and David (our two other friends) can do this because they're guys."

I get enough of this shit from the media for being a woman in the engineering profession, so I tried to get across my point as politely as possible in what I hoped was disarming humour. I tried to tell her that of course that wasn't true and I was a little hurt by her comment.

And she shouted at me and said, "Could you stop being such a fucking feminist for one second? I was joking!"

Aaaand I was just shocked speechless.

Comments

[aliaswestgate.livejournal.com]

I really do hate that. She's probably better at math than i am, and my complaint is that my brain doesn't work that way. My talents lie in music and in words, not in numbers and i know it. I can still do some mid level to high difficulty math, i just have to work my ass off for it. But on some level she's got a greater affinity for it than i ever will.

Gender really has nothing to do with it, just how things arrange themselves in your head. I used to use the 'but i'm a girl' complaint but its gone the way of the dodo in the last decade of my life.

I'd be shocked at her too, for that last line. Seriously, WTF?

[ladylade.livejournal.com]

That sucks, especially since the whole "you have no humor, obviously" thing is something that I'm used to guys using (and maybe you as well?), not females.

If you're ever in a situation where someone's "joking" like this again, try looking at them blankly and saying, "I don't get it." It puts them in the same bind that they try to put you in by implying you have no humor, but this way it's actually justified. (Also, there will never be anything funnier than a jackass trying to explain "make me a sandwich" while you pretend to be slightly vapid. It involves a lot of half-finished sentences and eventually an undignified exit out of the conversation.)

Also, math! I really, really love how beautiful math is, but sadly my high school calc. teacher ruined me for any type of the higher math courses. But when I get really stressed out I write out (well, a part of) the Fibonacci sequence or the Collatz Conjecture.

[angstbunny.livejournal.com]

D:

May I recommend Captain Awkward? As the name suggests, it's a blog for advice on how to deal with awkward situations, such as when otherwise nice people say shit that offends or upsets you.