Best Movies/Documentaries Never Made

[foolish_m0rtal]

"Gene Hunt vs. Tim the Enchanter"



"Lex Murphy Averts Global Crisis"



"Rabbit and Eeyore Lose Their Cool," or "Hundred Acre Wood: End of Days"



"Carrie and River's High School Reunion"
                           and
"Man vs. Wild with River Tam"



"The Land After Time: Rise of the Small Furry Mammals"



"Frak This Shit: The Ballad of Felix Gaeta"



"Paul Atreides and the Masters of the Universe: The OPEC Deception"



"Matrix IV: The Gate Is Down"
                          or
"Mythbusters with Ender and Bean"



"Dancing with the Stars: Justice League Edition"



"Boy Meets Milky Way: Galactic Quest"




"I Knew I Should Have Stayed Home Today: The Cyborg Wars"




"My Double Life as Sasquatch, by Alan Moore"



"Doctor Who, the Transgender Game"



"Doom Patrol: Lost in Paris"




"The Butler Did It: Confessions of a Homicidal Maniac"



"The Rise and Fall of Race Bannon"



"Dollhouse: Siege of the Zombies"



"Maurice by E.M Forster with Joe Talbot and That Guy From Episode 34"



"The Craggy Fjords of Slartibartfast"




"Harvey Keitel as Himself"

Comments

[obseletevulture.livejournal.com]

*cackles wildly at:*

--The Land After Time: Rise of the Small Furry Mammals
(Hey Spike! Can you say "chainsaw of natural selection"?)
--Paul Atreides Takes On OPEC
(I have an alternate fuel source, and the only side effect is it turns you into a blue-eyed telepath...)
--Mythbusters with Ender and Bean
(XDDD Ender of course, would get all existential and upset when he finds out something's wrong, and Bean would say "well of course THAT doesn't work. I saw that coming a week ago."-----so says the person who jsut spent a week solid reading Orson Scott Card and Neil Gaiman. I don't care if Bean is a giant, and he's fictional! He rescued Indians with the help of Thai people, and helped Peter take over the world! All Ender did was accidental insecticide!)
--Man vs. Wild with River Tam
(I can't possibly come up with commentary here. It speaks for itself.)
--Dancing with the Stars: Justice League Edition
(Who in their right mind would dance with the Flash? I mean, when he steps on your foot he probably does it a hundred times a second...)

[foolish-m0rtal.livejournal.com]

blarg, I went through the list I had written up and realized I had missed a few. Post has been updated.

I would really like to see Paul Atreides v. OPEC. I feel like we could get a lot of issues resolved.

Magic School bus was going to be "The Trials of Valerie Frizzle" but I felt like that didn't convey what the movie was really about. And it sounded like a weird 19th century book about women's rights and garters

[obseletevulture.livejournal.com]

Blarg blarg HONK. You don't see me complaining.

Oh yes, lots of issues--We'll all go fight on this planet here, and whoever wins gets to set up an absolute monopoly on the fuel market. That's what I call progress. *amused* (Ahh...this makes me want to play "Emperor: Battle for Dune" when I get home, though...)

Well as the person who got told I was "most likely to grow up and turn into Miss Frizzle" (to which I responded in outrage--I'm not THAT snappy a dresser!) I suppose my two cents might count a little if I say it made me think she was on trial for something other than eating a pickle.

[obseletevulture.livejournal.com]

Oh no...it's TIM. *dies of laughter*

Also, having a cyborg war on the magic schoolbus woudl be as interesting as when I tried to discuss with my dad what would happen when the Replicators met the Borg...

[foolish-m0rtal.livejournal.com]

I seriously wondered that too.
Borg vs. Replicators.
Only ONE can survive to assimilate the WORLD!

Ms. Frizzle is basically the BEST

[obseletevulture.livejournal.com]

Not exactly! *HAHAHA!*
See, the replicators basically assimilate in technology, but the Borg ARE technology. So what happens is, in order to be "compatible" with Borg technology, the replicators hook into their system. The borg take over and enslave the replicators as parts of themselves, and briefly begin to use them to take over the galaxy...then the Replicators adapt, and the borg adapt, and they both try to outdo one another, until one day, the Replicators break through and crash the borg system, and overturn the borg and use them as a buffet table. After which, the entire universe is pretty much doomed, but the borg are gone! *laughs*
It took a very long, detailed argument on both sides...

YES SHE IS. Nobody else coordinates their wardrobes with their subject matter, and manages to have matching shoes and earrings TOO.